Bananas

 For the sake of documentation, I just wanted to capture my memory of the birth of our 3rd child! 

At 39 weeks pregnant, I awoke at midnight with my water breaking and waddling to the bathroom. I woke up my husband and had him call my mom whom was on standby to watch the other kids. 

I started to  get excited yet nervous to meet this new little one. Once my mom arrived at our house we left for the hospital. With my other 2 kids my water broke while in labor and only once I had progressed to nearly pushing so we were initially a bit worried about getting to the hospital. But then upon arriving I was equally nervous that no contractions or anything had started. Your brain can get the best of you and I wondered if something was wrong.

I was monitored and checked and ultimately sent home with the staff insisting my water did not break. Then “what the heck came out of me”, I wondered as we drove back home. We got only a few hours of sleep till the big kids woke up and more fluid ran out. But still no contractions. 

My husband convinced me to take the day off work and good thing I did. (I was stubborn and took much convincing)We walked down the road and I had a midwife check up that afternoon with my favorite midwife. My mom called right as I was about to leave for my checkup insisting she take me and I not drive myself. Thanks mom, you know how stubborn I am.

I told my midwife what happened she checked me, immediately proclaimed my water did break, contractions were starting and I was to go to the hospital/ birthing center immediately. I got dressed called my husband and my midwife gave me a big hug. And simply said “Stacey, you’re going to meet this baby today! You can do it!” She knew exactly what I needed to hear.

So my mom took me to the hospital, where triage was rude saying if my mom stays they don’t allow people to “switch out” and wouldn’t let my husband in when he got there. They “graciously  allowed” her to stay in the waiting area after much convincing while Nate was on his way in case I progressed quickly. I understand Covid rules trying not to let a bunch of people in, but seriously people- if a woman is in labor she needs someone as a support person.

Luckily this baby wasn’t in a rush and after being monitored, Nate arrived and I was once again cleared for the natural birthing center.

They walked me into room 3, where we had Dottie 4 years ago, and looked across the hall at the other room Wes was born in 20 months ago. I’m so so grateful I’ve been able to have my babies in this amazing space!

Things were slow to progress, and there’s a beautiful outdoor walking area I haven’t used before, it was going to rain soon so I told Nate it was now or never and we walked around doing laps. It was chilly but I  knew it would be good for me.

Back inside, I was so glad the midwife on staff stayed with me the whole time. For Wesley’s birth, even when I was dilated  to a 9, a different midwife immediately left the room so my husband had to find her 5 mins later when I was ready for birth. But the one we had this time stayed yet didn’t intervene, her and Nate talked while I breathed and worked through it, giving me support and water when needed. But she complimented me for staying calm and could see progress and knowing it was my third time around knew I was ok. We planned for Nate to catch the baby, but as baby made its way out, the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. So the midwife swooped in seamlessly, fixed everything and Nate pronounced it was another little girl.

Hanna Marie

9lbs 4oz 

March 2, 2022 at 8:22pm (military time is 20:22) so kinda perfect timing with numbers 😀

We quickly realized the longer birth was she was also born “sunny side up”, like her sister, which is way harder to do. And at that big weight, phew- well- Hanna sure did test my limits. Haha

As she was placed on me, she wasn’t crying and I kept asking if she was ok, she did look a bit blue/purple, due to the cord, but she took her breath at last.

And then there were five.

Hanna- meaning “gracious.” It was the only other girl name we debated when Dottie was born. Hannah in the Bible struggled with infertility and god finally gave her children. Though we had our Hanna easily this time around, that wasn’t the case prior to Dottie. We had a lot of grieving times.

We also thought the character from the movie Hanna was amazing. A teenager with strength and abilities of a soldier. So far our Hanna is very much living up to her name with lots of “growling “ noises and that she crawled and pulled up to stand at 5 months old and now at 6 months goes straight to standing without pulling up in anything. And then walking at 9 months old.

Marie- my middle name, and I was named after my aunts. But it does mean “star of the sea”. And with us living on the lake, it’s perfect. She does enjoy the water and viciously splashes in it.

She is strong, fierce, and determined, already funny, sweet and beautiful.

So excited to see how she grows and continues to fit in our family. ❤️

Letting Go

Last month, we took the handle bar off the back of my daughter’s bike. She’s 3, but last Fall at age 2 she was riding her bike without training wheels! 

My husband deserves all of the credit. When COVID kept him home for 2 months last year while I worked in the basement, he took her out biking every day. He would have her alternate between pedaling and working on her balance bike. Between the 2, she was set up for success. He took the training wheels off and once we had her steady, we would let go and run next to her. She’s now mastered starting and stopping so we took the bar off the back and held our breath.

But there was no need to worry, she proved to us yet again that she’s more capable than we realize. We rode up and down all the streets of our neighborhood, and as we did I began to cry.

4 years ago that very day, I was laying on the bathroom floor crying, calling the doctor who once again said, “Stacey, it doesn’t look like you’re going to keep this baby.” A month after that I was in the hospital with so much blood loss they had a bucket under me saying I almost needed a blood transfusion, and the month after that I just refused to go to the doctor because they didn’t know the cause of blood loss and I was scared to have them admit me to labor and delivery at 4 months pregnant. 

But here she is, that little human once inside me, grew into a strong, smart and spunky little girl.

Another reminder that God wrote this story, this life we are living.

It made me think about how in so many ways life is about letting go. I just weaned my son from nursing as he is almost 1 year old and we were both ready.

We grow and teach our children to be capable and independent. And with that, we’ll have to continue to let go. To let them dress themselves, go to school, one day drive a car, get married and create a family of their own. This is just the beginning of many things we will have to “let go” as time marches ever forward.

What are you letting go of in your life? I talked to a friend recently who said she has learned more this past year to let go of what other’s think, let go of comparing. Maybe you’re letting go of negativity and bad relationships, jobs, etc. 

Maybe you’ve lost loved ones that you miss so much. People that have made such a profound impact on your life. 

Cherish as much as you can each day. You never know what you will have to let go of tomorrow.

As you wish

Hope you and your family are all well. Who would’ve thought the year 2020 would’ve unfolded as it has. Coronavirus has flipped everyone’s lives upside down. I hope you’re able to find goodness out of this stressful crazy time. For us, part of the goodness was welcoming baby #2.

Let me explain… No, there is too much. Let me sum up.

Last year, especially after losing my Nana, we knew we wanted to try for another baby. It took longer than we expected and we had another loss. I began to come with the reality that maybe our family size was set at 3. One day as my daughter and I were driving home, a little rain shower stopped and from the back seat she yelled, “mama, there’s a rainbow.” I looked to see that she was right. I told her sometimes God sends us rainbows as a sign that things will be better and asked her if she thought maybe this rainbow was for us. She quickly said it is and 2 weeks later I had a positive pregnancy test the day before Halloween. It was also as I completed a 100 day exercise program and had been feeling better than ever in a long time. 

Get some rest. If you haven’t got your health, then you haven’t got anything.

This pregnancy was so much easier, as I didn’t have any of the crazy potential miscarriage signs as I had with my first. I also was blessed with no morning sickness. All the kicks and baby hiccups, and how I looked was exactly as when I carried my daughter so I was thinking we might be having another girl. One night in January when my daughter wasn’t sleeping, I crawled into bed with her. I was about to do the infamous “parent slowly creep out of bed and crawl away on the floor maneuver “, when my daughter bolted up and declared “ mama, it’s a boy.” I opened my eyes with shock and asked her what she was talking about and she said “ the baby, in your tummy, it’s a boy!”. 

I got shivers and we both went back to sleep. She said it with such conviction she had me convinced it was a boy. I think safe to say, maybe God whispered this to her to pass onto us. 

Your vote of confidence is overwhelming.

Then as you all know covid 19 hit, we’ve all been in quarantine... and frankly we’re still in it. The hospitals all have more restrictions and new policies in place. I had to go through 3 checkpoints and a covid test while in labor before they would allow my husband to be with me.

I started to go into labor 2 days after my due date. I went into the office for a midwife checkup and did a membrane sweep. I left feeling fine and waddled away. 3 hours later, I started to have some light contractions about 7pm so I called my parents to pick up Dottie. They picked her up and my husband and I walked around the block before hopping into the car to drive to the hospital.

(Walking into the hospital)

Upon arrival, we parked, applied our masks and started to walk in. At the first checkpoint, there was a lady checking people in and taking temperatures. She saw I was in labor and was so nice and left the person she was checking and rushed to my side asking me questions, took temperature and walked us to the elevator for the labor ward.

At the labor unit, we waited in line. Finally, our turn, temperature checked and questions answered again. Then we waited in the lobby for an hour! Longest hour ever! But between contractions, I looked up to see another man sitting in a chair waiting. Looking familiar I finally got the guts to ask him who his wife was and come to find out, it was a friend I had danced with on poms back in high school! She was also there to deliver her baby! “ Inconceivable.”

After baby was monitored and my Covid test came back negative, they deemed me able to go to Karmanos Natural birthing center. I briefly talked to the midwife that was on that evening and she left my husband and I in the beautiful birthing suite. After an hour I was really feeling that things had progressed, I had my husband locate the midwife and bring her back to check me. Before checking me, she asked me if she could break my water and as I was saying NO, my water literally broke on its own. Phew! She then checked and let me know I was dilated to a 9 and left the room.

To me this was completely different that my first baby. I had a different midwife and she stayed and labored with me the whole time. I was very surprised that this midwife didn't stay at all considering how quickly everything was progressing. Even though Nate was super helpful and supportive, I couldn't help but feel a little discouraged that this midwife wasn't as attentive. I realize now how spoiled I was with my first birth and also so thankful because atleast this time I knew what to expect.

After 45 mins I had Nate get the midwife again. She told me I was at a 10 but I didn't seem read to push. After only a few pushes out came out baby and Nate was able to announce that it was a little boy!

We both looked at each other and both said "Dottie was right!" This is true love. You think this happens every day? 

Wesley Clarence joined our family at 8lbs 13oz and 19.5 inches long. Our Corona baby. So far a nursing champ, growing so quickly and has already been showing us his calm and chill personality. From the very beginning of Nate and I dating, we both have always liked the name Wes for a boy. For him, he has a friend/mentor that he admires and for me it was the Princess Bride movie. (P.S. try to count how many Princes Bride movie quotes are in this post!) Clarence means "bright" and comes from my husband's grandfather's name. Grandpa Clarence and Grandma Dorothy bought the property we are building our new house on and built the log cabin that we knocked down last year. So in a way, our own Wesley (Clarence) and Dottie are making their way back to Maceday Lake!

Dottie has been super sweet to him and we've been so thankful not knowing how she would adjust but she seems to be just fine. Knowing that when he cries, he usually needs milk, and she asks to hold him first thing every morning. We can't wait to see what these 2 children will bring to the world, and we're blessed to have them with us. 

Hope you and your family are well and healthy during such odd times. We hope you can find the good and beautiful.

Back to Basics- Health

Where has 2018 gone? Our daughter brought us so much joy this year. How fascinating it has been to watch all of her first milestones, and seeing her little personality come to life.

"I prayed for this child, and the Lord has granted me what I asked of him." Samuel 1:27

I will try to write again more soon to recap our year, what we've learned and hard trials we've overcome. But it's been an overwhelmingly beautiful year that we have been blessed with.

Again, I've been at the drawing board about what I would like to focus on in the new year. I have decided on : health.

Though I had no issues getting back to my pre-pregnancy weight. (I know you might hate me, but that's another topic I'll try to write on later. Battling gestational diabetes naturally, limiting what I could eat and lots of exercise, baby with food allergies, etc)

I have barely exercised this past year, I actually don't feel as strong as when I was pregnant, nursing for a year, barely sleeping all year has drained me. I know I need to get back to focusing on my health.

I want to maintain healthy eating and incorporate more fish into our diet, exercise more regularly, go back to church more regularly (it was hard with a colic/allergy baby. But I think going is good for my mental health) get more sleep, and visit my friends more.

Life is so short, even if you get blessed with old age. Babies grow too quickly, sunny days speed away, the clock never pauses...

I wish you and your family health and happiness in whatever you do in 2019!

I'd love to hear your thoughts, goals, and/or word of the year. Please comment below!

New Addition to the Family

Dottie Lynn was born on January 9th at 1:06pm, 8lbs 3oz and 19 in long. Needless to say we are absolutely over the moon in love with her.  I know everyone says having a little one is amazing,  but now that we are parents ourselves, my husband sums it up as he was missing out on life before she was here. Somehow the love the 2 of us had multiplied and is overflowing with love for her.

I do want to share and document a bit about her birth in case it is helpful to others. I read a lot of natural birthing stories and want to be a supportive, positive light for those that are worried or have negative feelings.

I also want to preface a couple of items that I think helped contribute to an easier birth. Despite all of the green and healthy things I eat, I was absolutely devastated when I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes toward the end of my pregnancy. I kept thinking, how could this happen? I eat my green smoothies everyday for breakfast, some kind of veggie soup and salad for lunch and a sensible dinner. It is what it is, so no carbs, no fruit and no sugar for the last 2 months of my pregnancy.

Since I wanted to try to have natural birth, I had to keep my sugar in check with diet and exercise alone. If I were to get on any medication I would be disqualified from the facility we choose. So I revamped my eating and exercised for 20 mins every morning, usually with light weights, and walked 2.5 miles with my husband every evening after dinner. Sometimes I would walk the 15 flights of stairs at my work as well.

I actually lost 4lbs the last 2 months of my pregnancy, I felt great and was mentally prepared. I did ask my midwife for a membrane sweep at my 39 week appointment as I was already dilated to a 3. I left the office feeling nauseous, lightheaded and already had some cramping.

My husband and I ate dinner and I relaxed for once, due the cramping and didn't walk our usual path. I did however lightly and slowly shovel some snow in our driveway.

I woke up at 2am with contractions. I was so giddy excited but tried to calm myself to go back to sleep not knowing how long this process could be. I knew I needed rest and strength. I woke at 5am with stronger contractions and debated whether or not to wake my husband.

5:30am I woke him and told him he probably shouldn't go to work. I called the midwife and she said since I could talk through contractions, that I should wait a little longer. They did ramp up, and in the meantime I slowly ate a spoonful of peanut butter and 2 scrambled eggs. The contractions were more intense and I called back an hour later and they said to head into the birthing center. From that point on, to work through the contractions, I would breathe in and do a slow and low hum out and repeat. Knowing that it was only a minute long was a big help and then have a few minutes break in between. I just kept at it.

At that point it was 7:30am ish on a Tuesday and there was some rush hour traffic that took us awhile to get to the hospital. Finally at the hospital, my husband offered to drop me off at the door but I really didn't want to leave his side so I insisted he park and we would walk in together. We were parked on the 2nd floor of a structure and stubborn me also insisted on walking down the stairs instead of taking the elevator.

We got into triage, where baby and I were checked and they deemed us both healthy to continue onto the natural birthing suite. They also checked my progress and confirmed I was already dilated to a 7! We both cried and hugged. All of our worry at the beginning of this pregnancy when we kept almost losing this sweet baby, the memories of the one we lost in February last year, my determination and walking 2.5 miles in below zero temperatures....well here we were on the brink of baby's Birthday and it was just so sweet!

I lucked out with my favorite midwife on call, and she met me in the natural birthing suite with a full bathtub, the lights dimmed and lavender oils. It was like a luxury hotel room, not the typical stark, sterile, cold hospital environment. It helped my husband and I feel more relaxed, which is one of the reasons why we chose this facility. It is also apart of the hospital, so if any complications arise, a couple doors down was a surgical room and there was a crash cart located outside of our door.

I labored in the tub for a while and it felt best when they were putting the hot water with a hose on my lower back. Come to find out later, she came out sunny side up, which contributed to my back labor and longer delivery. After some time my water still hadn't broke but I was dilated to a 10, so my midwife had me sit on the toilet for 3 contractions, and sure enough, sploosh! My water broke.

My husband then helped me to the bed. I had a contraction on my way there and he literally held all of me as I was too weak to stand. We don't have any pictures of me in labor, but the mental picture I have of that moment still brings me to tears. What a great man I have.

There was then 3.5  hours of pushing. My midwife and nurse, massaged my legs between contractions. It felt heavenly. Not something I would have imagined but they knew exactly what I needed. Their supportive words and encouragement kept me going. My husband would put a cool cloth on my forehead as I got hot with each contraction and then I got cold and he would wrap me with warm blankets once it would cease. He said he knew when another contraction was coming because I would scrunch up my face.

Before I knew it, out the baby came. My midwife said, "Stacey, grab your baby." And I reached down and finished pulling her out and onto my belly. All wiggly and slippery, I laid with her on my belly in a heap on exhaustion and wonder. We didn't know if we had a baby boy or girl, so my husband helped pick her up and slide the umbilical cord over to announce that we had a little girl.

Dottie Lynn joined our family! I almost couldn't believe it, she was here, safe and perfect. I felt hot tears on my face, and I looked up to see they were not mine but my husbands. And we cried and held little Dottie.

We picked out her name for a few different reasons. My husband's grandmother's name was Dorothy and he describes her as revolutionary, and was a big part of his life. I wear her wedding ring today as my own.  Dorothy also means "gift from God." We had a hard time picking out a middle name but finally landed on Lynn. As a shortened rendition of Linda, another motherly figure in my husband's life and meaning "lake." Also suitably as Grandma Dorothy lived on a lake that we now own property and will work on building our home in the next couple of years.

Like everyone says, the time goes by so fast. We have already seen her change so much in the last 2 months. We look forward to seeing what kind of person she will be and we look forward to expanding our family, God willing.

Welcome 2018- Cultivate

I'm sure you all have seen many posts about a "word" to live by in the New Year. I must admit I love this idea. As I sat to ponder the last year this past week, I also looked for what I wanted to value and focus on for 2018.

(Rainbow baby)- Our Trip to Niagara Falls

For me, my word is Cultivate.

-I want to cultivate a loving family (As I am due with our first child in 2 weeks)
-I want to cultivate more generosity & giving back to others. Whether it be in my actions, literal help/donations or simply in being a listening ear to someone.
-I want to cultivate my mind by reading more
-I want to cultivate a thriving garden to nourish my family & save money

About 6 months pregnant

My absence in posting on this page, is mainly due to the fact that I am pregnant. Though I feel great, like many people, we have had our trials. After losing a baby in February, I found myself quite depressed. I was aware of my feelings but also had a hard time shaking how I felt. I was unmotivated and wanted to curl up and hibernate. April brought us a baby, but with 4 months of scares of almost losing it and having to have a blood transfusion. The mental stress this put on both my husband and I was draining.

We are so blessed that this little one is healthy and I am happy to say that we are on the home stretch. I know so many others that have things much harder in life, and I try not to take any of these precious moments for granite. Now I feel like we are sitting and waiting for this little miracle. And my husband and I are so excited.

I would like to share more over the next year. As I do have maternity leave away from work. I know life will create new busyness with a baby. We are also in the midst of starting to work with an architect to draw up house plans in preparation for moving.

9 months pregnant

A lot of other bloggers and youtubers I've watched, used the term "Season of Life." Sometimes life throws crazy things at you, but it is a good reminder that it is not permanent and it will change and evolve.

May you find happiness and success with your endeavors this year!

Cheers to 2018!

Keeper of the Bees

I've been planning for years to have my own honey bees. At the beginning of May, I made a 4 hour round trip to pick them up. I handed over my prepaid receipt, and I was handed a buzzing box of thousands of  bees. I could feel the wind of their wings beating through the crate, and the immense heat from their tiny pulsating bodies.

It is a true wonder how such a small thing like a bee, can seem like an innocent passerby-er, but collectively they are mighty intimidating.  And when you factor in their role in our world, pollinating our crops, our need for them for our food supply. This tiny creature is greatly overlooked.

My delay in posting about them is because it was not a smooth process. But for the sake of keeping it real, I wanted to share my experience with you. My error was installing the bees on a cooler day. I thought it would be a gentler process to open the crate, hang the queen on a frame, and let the bees get out of the box on their own. I checked about 3 weeks in and could not locate the queen. So I rushed to find one, terrified that I had already failed as a beekeeper.

I luckily located Turtlebee Farms- http://www.turtlebeefarms.com/. They had a queen bee, and the whole family was so pleasant and knowledgeable, that I instantly feel in love with them. There are still good, kindhearted people in this world, and what a pleasure it was to meet them. They welcomed me into their home and bee shop, and gave me all kinds of tips. They explained that you can only do the "gentler" process on warmer days. It appears the bees didn't get out of the box and surround the queen as they should've and didn't keep her warm. They gave me a mated queen, (A few bees that already knew her as their queen), and also offered if it didn't work to help me with frames of brood as well.

All worked out, the hive accepted the 2nd queen, and they have been in full force since June. I've been boosting them with some extra sugar water now as we get into Fall. From what I've heard from some fellow beekeeping friends is that my bees maybe a little bit behind schedule. So I'll continue to keep you updated as time goes on.

Why did I decide to keep bees? It really seemed like a natural progression for me. I have always loved to cook, Having access to the best and freshest food has lead me to love gardening, which in turn has lead me to bees. (chickens are also on my radar, but I am still working on my husband on that one.) Bee keeping gives me a little self-sufficiency that I find completely gratifying.

Maybe a part of my heart loves farming due to some of our family roots. Our family farm in Kentucky was sold in the Spring, and the following week I had my box of bees. Our family has been reminiscing all of our times there, the good and the bad memories. My mother commented that the farm is no longer gone. I was a little confused at first wondering what she meant. The papers were signed, it was a done deal. But she said my new honey bees are like my own little farm, along with my small backyard garden. The farm is not gone, it is in my soul and it is here with me. Kinda ironic when life comes full circle sometimes.